Communication Pet Peeves: The Phone Tree

Have you ever called a large company and found yourself in the middle of...

THE PHONE TREE!  (phone tree...tree...tree...)

If you have, you've likely experienced the frustration of one of my biggest communication pet peeves.  Desperate to find the answers you seek, you remain on the line long after the hold music has stopped.  You've pressed every button known to man and you've tried to connect with every department you think just MIGHT have something to do with your particular issue.  After endless patience and wearing your index finger down to a nub, you find you've finally reached a live body and,'s a little scenario I wrote that helps illustrate THE PHONE TREE.  (phone tree...tree...tree...) Press 1 if you speak Spanish, Press 2 if you speak English, Press 3 if want a listing of our locations, Press 4 if you want to listen to a commercial about how great we are, Press 5 if you want to wait on hold indefinitely while you listen to bad elevator music for six and half minutes before we accidentally disconnect you, Press 6 if your question is about how great we are, Press 7 if you'd hold for a half hour to place an order, Press 8 if you like the color blue, Press 9 if know your account number and wish to remain on hold, Press...oh I'm sorry we ran out of numbers, please hold! I hope you enjoyed your Friday Funnies. I now return you to your regularly scheduled blog... If you liked this article, please subscribe to our RSS feed and share the link…


  • Carla

    One of my big pet peeves, too! One of the other annoying things is when they kick you out of the tree! You hold for 30 minutes or more and. . . all of a sudden. . . you get that ’ole favorite. . . DIAL TONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • JoJo

    Thanks Cindy, Merit. The voice activiation doesn’t seem to give a a choice you need. And yes she doesn’t sound like a real person. I used to call her Automated Audrey. lol

  • Merit K

    Oh I have been there! LOL! Yesterday I had to talk to voice activated software at Microsoft! I hate the lack of correct inflection in that robot voice. They can try to make it sound human, but they need to work on that! Thanks for helping to keep the tone light in spite of the automation frustration, JoJo :)

  • Cindy Holman

    One of mine too! Great subject of frustration!

  • JoJo

    Yup. That too!

Leave a comment