Is grace a two way street?

A few situations arose this past week that may give you cause to wonder if grace is a two way street for Christian conservatives.  Though I believe most people are respectful, even to those with whom they disagree, I do see that there are some who not only speak disrespectfully of us but who feel justified in doing so.  But if you think the secular world in general endorses this behavior, you would be wrong.  And what's more, I believe,  there is something we Christians can do that will help us win back favor with the secular world and it's called grace.
"Let your conversation always be full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." -Colossians 4:6
The first story I mention only because so many are talking about it.  However, I must preface this by stating that I cannot verify the person's statement nor the intent with any credibility.  I had thought I remembered the story being aired on Fox News by either Sean Hannity or Bill O'Reilly, but in the last few days, my research has come up with only a few blogs and a small article on One News Now that did not have a link to the orignal MSN piece. Megan Fox, star of Transformers, was reported to have been recently quoted by MSN in a piece entitled "The Wit and Wisdom of Megan Fox"  in which she allegedly said she would barter with Megatron (a character from the movie), suggesting that he “just take out all of the white trash, hillbilly, anti-gay, super bible-beating people in Middle America?” If this was, indeed her statement, it certainly paints a picture of someone who is mean-spirited and it begs the question if folks would feel the same way (or if MSN would feel the same way about airing this piece) if the actress had taken a pot shot against homosexuals.  However, I don't see main stream America lining up to defend this sentiment.  In fact, what I did see were people questioning the validity of anything else to come out of her mouth.  What I read, for the most part, were people (though not always in the most gracious way) who were unwilling to spend money to see her new movie.  Remember that the right to freedom of speech does not negate the right of the listener to take offense and act accordingly.  Remember the Dixie Chicks? How about the recent comments made by comedian and late night host, David Letterman, about Sarah Palin and her daughter?  This story was all over the internet in places like Associated Press, Fox News, The LA Times and US News and World Report.  Again, hardly anyone is condoning the statements and even Mr. Letterman, himself, has apologized though many may argue it's not sincere. But here's my point.  God gave each of us free will and there are times when folks will choose to be evil with their mouths.  Sometimes they don't mean it the way it sounded and sometimes they mean it exactly the way it sounded.  Either way, instead of getting angry and lashing out, let's address the issues fairly and in grace.  Let's call it wrong but let's do so with respect and in love.  Why? Do you all remember the movie, Fireproof?  What was Caleb asked to do when he took the Love Dare?  Was he asked to treat his wife with love only when she showed love to him?  No!  God doesn't love us only when we are lovable.  Thank God!  LOL  God's love is Agape Love, unconditional love.  The love we are asked to show to our fellow man and, yes, even when he sins against us.  What happened to Caleb's wife after she was treated with love?  Yup!  She began to see the merits of her husband and feel a deep love for him again. I submit to you that, if the Christian community would rise up and speak the truth in grace and in love, we would accomplish great things in the Lord!  Think of each of these issues as an opportunity to discuss, instead of grievances to be made right or arguments to win.  If grace is a two way street, which way came first?  Mr. Letterman is no spring chicken, but may I point out that the Bible is several thousand years old.  Let's share our thoughts in grace and with respect, even if the other doesn't, and see where it gets us!  Go on!  I double dog love dare ya!  :D ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ JoJo Tabares holds a degree in Speech Communication, but it is her humorous approach to communication skills which has made her a highly sought-after Christian speaker and writer.  Her articles appear in homeschool publications, such as Homeschool Enrichment Magazine and The Old Schoolhouse Magazine, which also endorses her Say What You Mean curricula, including Say What You Mean Defending the Faith.  You can also find JoJo on web sites such as and and hosting her weekly podcast, Grace Talk Soup.  For more information on communication FUNdamentals and Christian-based communication skills for the whole family, please visit


  • Cindy Holman

    Powerful post, JoJo. Great thoughts here. I have always felt that love is the greatest motivator that our world has ever had – or ever will have. There is no love from these people who disrespect and tear down other people – and narrow minded people never succeed or prosper – at least for long – and never permanently. No – I choose to love and to forgive others weaknesses – differences and shortcomings – they are in there with the champ – ME!

  • Carla

    I totally agree with you, JoJo. I read those supposed comments of Megan Fox’s and I couldn’t find a solid verification either. It wouldn’t surprise me, though. You have to remember that there are a full two generations walking our streets who are now adults and have never been to church or heard the Gospel. These two generations were raised in a world where abortion is simply birth control and know nothing of “the way it was.” I have had three children in public school this year. Even secular parents teach their children nothing of manners or what you and I used to call “common courtesy.” There is no more common courtesy. Christians now are no longer the mainstream. We are the last acceptable prejudice. It’s okay to bash us because we are against almost everything that Americans now stand for in the sacrosanct name of “tolerance.” If you only knew how I hate that word!!!

    You know how I love American history. Every time I read one of these comments from quote, unquote, “today’s Americans,” I think to myself. . . Washington, Adams, Jefferson, Madison and others must be weeping in their graves. To think that they suffered, bled and died by the thousands. . . risked everything at any cost. . . and it’s all turned to this. SIGH

  • jojosblog

    So many scriptures speak of communicating in grace and in love.

    Yes, Catherine, the move toward grace must be done on both sides! I have seen so many posts from people saying they are Christian and then proceed to blast the other with an all out verbal assault.

    Laura, this is exactly what I teach in my book Say What You Mean Defending the Faith! It only takes a few to call themselves Christian and blast someone else for that someone to think this is what Christians are like! This is why God tells us to speak in grace in the first place but another reason is to combat the ideas that folks have that this is how a Christian is supposed to act.

  • Laura Bowman

    I believe this is one reason that the unchurched today want nothing to do with the church! We have spouted one thing and done the opposite for so long that they have no confidence in us. WWJD has become a cliche but we have not really lived by it because if we had we would not respond the way we have for so long.

    I agree, if you can’t tell, :-) It is time we showed love and grace and left the judging up to God.

  • Catherine Terry

    Excellent post, JoJo. Sadly, in my humble opinion, both sides need to dig in and consider unconditional love, or Agape Love. In addition to Washington, Adams, Jefferson, and Madison, I believe that there is One who weeps at our uncontrollable tongue. Jesus Christ.

    We need to show the world, weather we believe in their principles or not, that unconditional love. More is accomplished with a gentle hand than a clenched fist.

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