What's the Most Important Skill in Life?

Most parents today would probably say that the most important skills they want to make sure their children learn are math, science, history, and English.  Back in the "Olden Days," people would have said the three R's (which don't all begin with the letter R), Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic.  Most people surveyed say that the most important skills are the core subjects taught in school. I beg to differ and I believe the Bible backs me up on this.  

There are literally hundreds and hundreds of scriptures where the Lord shares why communication skills are so important, how we should speak to one another and what we shouldn't do when we communicate. Studies show that effective communicators do better in school, in their careers and their relationships.  Statistics say that 87% of what you and I do all day is communication related!  Lack of effective communication is the number one reason listed for marriage to fail.  Yet speech communication is thought of as an elective.

I can't think of one scripture in the Bible that speaks of the importance of math.  Can you?  Yet most Christians work hard to make sure their kids master math from 1st through 12th grade while spending little, if any, time teaching them to communicate effectively.

How important is communication in every day life? I've asked this very question at countless seminars I've given.  Most people say that communication is very important in their lives.  However, when I ask if anyone ever took a communication class or studied communication skills or taught their children effective communication, I get one of three answers:

1. Oh, I'm not a politician or a lawyer so I don't really need to make speeches. But I thought you just said you thought communication skills were important for your every day life?  Most people think of communication skills as speech or debate and equate these skills with things at which only lawyers and politicians need to be proficient.   They suddenly forget why they answered yes and immediately go to the speech and debate issue, do not pass go, do not collect $200!

Communication is so much more than speech making or debate.  You communicate when you talk to your husband or your children. You are communicating when you ask for a raise.  You are communicating when you wave or smile to your neighbor and when you don't quite know how to tell him not to trample your begonias.  You are communicating when you are trying to get through to your Aunt who doesn't want to see that movie.  You are communicating when you talk to your child's ballet teacher and when you are trying to get across to your doctor that why you don't want your son to get vaccinated. Communication is involved in 87% of what we do all day long and most of that isn't formal speech.  It's a conversation and if we aren't careful it can be an argument that ends a dear friendship.

2. I took a speech class once in college. Taking a speech class once does not allow you to master the art of speech making nor does it afford you training in any other type of communication.  I know some wonderful speech makers and debaters that are horrid one on one!  They can wax poetic on the stage or in front of a small crowd but intimidate the begeebers outta friends and family when making small talk at family gatherings.

3. Oh, I'll have my kids take a speech communication class when they are in high school. Did you know that communication skills are best learned when kids are young, even as young as preschool?  Did you also know that by the time many children are in 5th or 6th grade, society has trained them to be afraid of social interaction? Many children become socially shy or intimidated in social situations if they have not had enough training prior.  It becomes a vicious cycle where they are too shy to enter social situations and too shy to admit they need help and then too shy to put themselves in situations that could improve their social communication skills! I know this because that was me when I was a kid!  It took me years to get over it, but it doesn't have to take you or your children years! 

By making learning communication skills fun, Art of Eloquence has helped thousands of children and adults become more comfortable in social situations and more effective communicators overall!

Here's what one mom had to say: “This class has also helped to facilitate discussion in our family around the dinner table. You have a way of presenting things in a straight forward way that is so understandable.Thank you JoJo” -Marcie, Homeschooling mom of two

Our communication skill affects 87% of our lives. I think that's why the Lord put HUNDREDS of scriptures in the Bible that instruct us and tell us how vital these skills are!  Though there are some scriptures that mention numbers, I can't find one scripture that talks about how important it is to study math.  Yet most people don't think twice about giving math importance in their children's studies. 

Don't you think communication should at least be of equal importance? Art of Eloquence can help by making it fun and easy to learn this often intimidating and complicated subject.  Browse our catalog.  We have studies for all ages and for various communication situations.


  • JoJo Tabares

    You’re quite welcome, Amanda.

  • Amanda

    There are so many appalling mistakes happening that almost all of them could have been avoided in the first place. If the first party had a better communication skill to begin with. Instead people are relying more and more. And expecting that the other person knows exactly what they mean in the way you mean it. Thank you so much for this post!

  • JoJo Tabares

    Quite true. Most people don’t realize how important it is for them to be effective when they are just talking to friends or emailing a company…until something goes wrong, but usually they will blame the other party for not understanding. The best communication between people begins with effective communication of the first person who speaks. If someone asks a question in a confusing way, it often leads to a frustrating series of responses back and forth. That all could be alleviated if the person asking was clear in the first place. Also if the person who is responding is clear in asking for clarification in the second place.

  • Dana

    Very good. I think people often take for granted the things they do every day without realizing that they could do them better.

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published