Disturbing decline in any interest in communicating well

StormFor quite some time, studies have shown that there has been a significant decline in communication effectiveness.  College professors report an increase in papers with text speak, slang and poor grammar.  Employers have reported a serious lack of communication skill in their new hire candidates and that it’s one of the reasons employees are not promoted.

You and I notice it every day when we speak to people, and chat with them on social media.  Sometimes the lack of communication skill is so apparent we can hardly make out what the person is trying to tell us.

However, it’s not as much a lack of training as it is a lack of interest.  The bottom line is that most people today don’t feel communication is a subject that merits any attention.  Why?

1. Undivided attention is overrated.  Multitasking is a valued skill, but what isn’t generally taken into account is the fact that the less you concentrate on something, the less efficient you are at it.  While you may be able to cook dinner, do the laundry and listen to little Johnny’s story, you probably didn’t catch everything he said.

2. The empowerment movement has told us that we have the right to free speech.  What they have not mentioned is the responsibility we face for the way in which we deliver that speech.  The idea is that I have the right to say whatever I want, but you don’t the right to be offended.  However the opposite is also taught: I have the right to be offended by anything you say and you have to make it up to me.  It’s a curious and unrealistic way to live.

Unfortunately, this is exactly why so many struggle in relationships, marriages and friendships these days. Relationships are all about communication and very few seek to master it these days. I teach communication skills and for the last ten years there has been a decline both in the skills demonstrated and the interest in learning and applying them.  If you’ve found yourself on the receiving end of a misunderstanding, you know what I mean.

It’s time we, as a society, take back the responsibility for what we say and how we say it.  It’s time to learn to speak effectively and in grace.  It’s time to be proactive…because what’s at stake are our relationships!  If you don’t, I can promise you there’s a storm coming!  A miscommunication storm that will leave your relationships in its wake.

Check out ArtofEloquence.com and take your stand now!  We have studies for PreK through adults and for every communication situation from speech and debate to sharing your faith and social skills!

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How to get our Conflict Resolution or Shyness Study for FREE!

Here’s our last Back to Homeschool Special Offer!

Buy Speech and Debate value package and get your choice of our Say What You Mean: Avoiding, Reducing and Resolving Conflicts study or our Say What You Mean: Overcoming Social Anxiety FREE!

Not only will you receive these two easy to use and fun studies, but you and your students will be able to decrease the jitters associated with making a speech by learning more about overcoming the anxiety people often feel in social situations and transferring those skills to speech making.  OR decreasing, resolving and avoiding the conflicts when you or your student is debating on a more personal level.

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Click the pictures to read more about these choices:

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Bonus Gift Choice

 

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To take advantage of this free bonus offer:

Just order the Speech and Debate package at the regularly low price this week.  Then forward the email confirmation of your order to me jojo @ artofeloquence .com and put either “FREE Social Anxiety” or  “FREE Conflicts” in the subject line.  It’s that easy!

I will email your copy within 48 hours of your order!  Just remember to order and email us before midnight PST on Saturday, August 31st. 

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NOTE: Don’t forget to submit your communication questions to jojo@artofeloquence.com for my monthly Ask JoJo section of my blog.  I’ll pick one question per month to answer right here on the blog!  You can ask anything related to communication skills from a tip on how not to be nervous making a speech to what games your kids can play that will help them hone their communication skills and even if your website or blog is clearly written!

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Birthday Bash Tomorrow!

Art of Eloquence will be TEN years old on November 1st! Mark your calendars so you don’t miss it because YOU get all the free gifts!  You can even win prizes!  Here’s how.  We’ll be celebrating from 11am to 1pm PST, Thursday, November 1st both on our blog and our Facebook fan page.

Two Hour Facebook Party

Time: 11am-1pm PST/ 12pm-2pm MST/ 1pm-3pm CST/ 2pm-4pm EST

Location: Facebook fan page.

Events: Communication touches every aspect of our lives so…during the Facebook Party, each of our ten sponsors (experts in their field) will be posting tips, links, and/or free gifts for you in all aspects of life.  Make sure you are on our fan page at that time so you can view them all.  Make sure to refresh your page so you can see all the new posts as they occur.

During that time, we will also post a link to each of the ten contests where you can win prizes donated by our sponsors. Winners will be chosen from all the correct answers posted as comments on each contest blog post.

You can check out all of our sponsors and the prizes they will be giving away as well as a few free gifts you can download right now on our Birthday Bash Page!

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Stay tuned to this blog tomorrow for even more Breaking NEWS.  HUGE announcement coming!

 

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Review of Romney’s Speech

Like many people, I watched Mitt Romney’s acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention, after which, there were the usual reviews by the pundits.  I know many of them have been around a lot longer than I have and they’ve heard many more political speeches, but I’d like to share my thoughts on why I disagree with most of them.

Many of them felt Mr. Romney made a great speech, a fabulous speech, one full of powerful words and impressive language designed to drive the crowd into a frenzy.   I disagree.

Britt Hume thought it was a good speech, but not a great speech because he felt those made by Paul Ryan and others were much more impressive.  I disagree, in part.

Romney’s speech was not flashy or rabble rousing.  It was uplifting, inspiring, respectful, honest and sincere.  It appeared to be aimed more at the Independents and disillusioned Democrats than the Republican base who had already made up their minds to vote for the Republican nominee.

Romney appealed to the women’s vote by talking about how important and difficult his wife’s career is.  He answered the accusations about Bain and the issues of big buisiness and his being out of touch with every day citizens by sharing how difficult it was to build his business, how not everything always worked and the limitations of a company.

He demonstrated a stark contrast to the negative tone of President Obama’s speeches by talking about America’s strength and assured us that hope in a better tomorrow for our children is still out there at a time when most Amercians desperately need hope to cling to.

You don’t always need to be flashy, rude, disrespectful or loud to be effective.  Sincere, succint, and honest wins out.

 

 

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Analysis of Romney’s Victory Speech

Romney did an excellent job of delivering his victory speech the other day.

His focus has changed since becoming the presumptive nominee.  He’s now focusing on conservative issues vs President Obama’s record instead of spending his time attacking the other Republican candidates.  The other candidates are getting behind him and that is unifying the party.  Further, Romney has learned a few things about being a good speaker in the last few months.

In this speech, his timing was good.  He hit all the major issues Republicans are concerned about.  He sounded and looked presidential.  He was gracious and uplifting.  While he didn’t sound like Ronald Reagan using wit and humor, he did sound and look remeniscent of Reagan in his uplifting view of hope for the country.  I also think he was rather humble by concentrating his speech on what the American people want and need instead of his qualifications.  He talked more about what he’ll do and not who he is.

What do you all think?

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What is Communication?

Communication is a word you’ve probably heard since you were young, but I’ll bet you can’t define it.  Some people think communication is talking, conversation, making a speech or persuading someone of something.  Others think it’s manners, etiquette or social graces.

Merriam Webster defines communication as “an act or instance of transmitting,” “information transmitted or conveyed,” “a verbal or written message,” “exchange of information,” “personal rapport,” or their most comprehensive definition, “a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior.”

Wikipedia has one of the most complete definitions of communication I have ever seen:

Communication is the activity of conveying information. Communication has been derived from the Latin word “communis”, meaning to share. Communication requires a sender, a message, and an intended recipient, although the receiver need not be present or aware of the sender’s intent to communicate at the time of communication; thus communication can occur across vast distances in time and space. Communication requires that the communicating parties share an area of communicative commonality. The communication process is complete once the receiver has understood the message of the sender.

I know I was subtle by putting it in bold, purple letters, but didja catch that last part?  I’d go one step further.  Effective communication is complete when the receiver has understood the message of the sender, the way in which the sender had intended!

True communication, effective communication requires that the listener understands the sender’s message in the spirit it was intended or the message is skewed, misunderstood and the relationship between the sender and receiver has changed or is damaged in some way.

Everyone talks, but not everyone truly communicates.  Everyone gets a message across, but not everyone has the ability to relate his message so effectively that his listener understands his message as it was intended.   Anyone can lecture, but not everyone can truly teach, enlighten.  Manners will only get you so far in a relationship.  A speech will not endear you to your neighbor.  A presentation will not help you resolve a conflict with your brother.  Social graces will not persuade a nation to elect the right candidate.  Etiquette cannot help you share your faith.  And the communication skills required for each of these activities are different.

Everyone learns to talk.  Very few learn to communicate effectively.  It isn’t because it’s a set of skills only important for lawyers and politicians.  It’s because society fully understands when communication is done badly, but does not understand that the reason behind the conflicts, divorce, lost job opportunities, and failed businesses is most often an inability to effectively express the vision.

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JoJo Tabares holds a degree in Speech Communication, but it is her humorous approach to communication skills which has made her a highly sought-after Christian speaker and writer.  Her articles appear in homeschool publications, such as Homeschool Enrichment Magazine and The Old Schoolhouse Magazine, which also endorses her Say What You Mean curricula.  You can also find JoJo on web sites such as Crosswalk.com and Dr.Laura.com.  For more information on communication FUNdamentals and Christian-based communication skills for the whole family, please visit http://www.ArtofEloquence.com

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Communication Skills in the news: Herman Cain

Don’t look now, but Gundar, our own personal Technology Gremlin, hasn’t been as busy here at Art of Eloquence the last few days.  Yes, we still have some computer issues, but our newly redesigned website and shopping cart are working just fine.  That gave us some time to start thinking about the kinds of information (and FUN) we’d like to have for you in 2012.

You’re going to start seeing some changes right here on the AoE Blog and also in our newsletter beginning this week!  We’re bringing back some old favorites (categories)…with a twist!

Mailbag Mondays start back up again today and will feature thngs like my commentary on the communication skills of a political figure or entertainer, my take on a recent social event or issue, some of the questions our customers ask most and reports of communication trends or innovations that affect how we communicate with one another.

Another feature we are bringing back is Word Wednesdays.  This category will include obscure words, vocabulary issues, how words have changed over the years, new terms emerging with technological advances and how the media and the politically correct have purposefully acted to change the meanings of certain words in order to fit their agenda.

Today’s Mailbag Monday report is on Herman Cain.

I was incredibly impressed with Herman Cain’s speech to the media directly answering the allegations against him by these women who recently came forward accusing him of sexual misconduct.  He was direct, clear and quite articulate in answering the issues. Cain addressed each of the issues the public might have been concerned about and he did it with conviction and sincerity.

The strongest issues he addressed during his speech were 1) the complete lack of evidence and 2) the fact that some of his accusers were unnamed and that some of the informants were unidentified.  3) In addition, he said what many of his supporters were thinking-that this type of unfounded accusation only serves to distract from the message and 4) that the media had a duty to uncover the facts.  5) At a time when many Americans are tired of the same old political rhetoric, Herman Cain doesn’t speak like a politician; he presents himself well and speaks plain English directly responding to the issues without skirting them.   6) Lastly, he assured the American people that he was strong enough to deal with issues like these and that he had even expected them.

This particular speech as well as others I have heard, reflect a strong leader who is prepared for the reality of public office.   Herman Cain presents himself as an honest, likeable man who isn’t running for the highest office in the land for the power, but for the country.  He comes across as a fresh alternative to politics as usual with some sound ideas for America’s future.   I think this was a smart move for Cain and will go a long way in helping him to put these issues to rest allowing him to move forward with his message.

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NEW at Art of Eloquence: UPDATED Sample Lessons

We’ve updated all our sample lessons!

Over the last year, I have been working almost exclusively on new communication studies, especially the ones that you have told us you needed.  Over the year, we have released:

Say What You Mean Debating the Issues

 

Say What You Mean Overcoming Social Anxiety

 

Say What You Mean Beginning Debate

 

Say What You Mean Avoiding, Reducing and Resolving Conflicts

 

This past year has left me precious little time to do some much needed revising of our website…and you all know how UNtechie I am.  Well, in the past few weeks, I’ve been working on several aspects of our website and today I’m ready to announce our first series of changes: UPDATED Sample Lessons!

After much techie frustration, I have finally been able to update and upload revised versions of the seven sample lessons that we have had, mostly for our homeschool curricula, and HEEEEEEAR they are!

 

Say What You Mean for Preschoolers

Say What You Mean for Kids

Say What You Mean for Teens

Know Your Audience

Say What You Mean: A Creative Speech Course

 

 

Say What You Mean: Defending the Faith

 

Say What You Mean When You’re in Business

 

Each sample lesson link is located toward the bottom of the page so feel free to browse!  I am currently working to create sample lessons for some of our newer studies which do not yet have them.  I should be finished with them all by Wednesday, so come on back to the blog and check them out!

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Art of Eloquence’s Seminar Schedule for 2011

Art of Eloquence is all about sharing the Communication FUNdamentals and we do that each year in creative and unique ways.  Though we do sell a variety of eBooks and digital products that teach preschoolers through adults various topics within speech communication, we are mostly a ministry.  That is to say, we give away a TON of information and free gifts each year.

One of the ways we love to serve is by hosting various seminars throughout the year on the Art of Eloquence Workshop and Seminar Channel on TalkShoe!  We are planning a fabulous line up of seminars and workshops featuring a variety of co hosts and panels of speakers to help you become more effective communicators both in your personal and business life.  We have already scheduled some amazing topics and speakers for the first half of the year.  Take a look at what is coming up in 2011!

What you need to know about sharing your faith
01/27/2011 6:30 PM EST (THAT’S TOMORROW!)
Dianna Wiebe of Grapevine Bible Studies and JoJo Tabares of Art of Eloquence team up to give you practical advice about the Bible and how to share your faith effectively and in a more conversational and relaxed way.

Communication: Much More Than Just Speech-Making
02/24/2011 11:00 AM EST
The Lord talks about our tongues, mouths and words literally HUNDREDS of times in His Word and almost none of it refers to formal speech-making. You may be able to live your entire life without having to make a speech but you won’t get through one day without communicating something to someone. Learn just how important communication skills are in everyday life for your relationships, marriage, parenting, business, ministry and career! Joining JoJo is Cindy Rushton (Homeschool and Marriage expert), Randee Krumwiede (Christian Counselor) and Gazelle Simmons (Virtual Assistant). 

How Communication Skills Can Grow Your Business in 2011
03/28/2011 12:00 PM EST
You may not realize it, but almost every aspect of your business involves communication skills. The more effective you are at communication, the more success you’ll have in your business. Jill Hart of CWAHM and a sampling of Christian Work at Home Moms join JoJo Tabares of Art of Eloquence to share tips and techniques for better communication with your customers, co workers, suppliers, employees and more!

What’s Your Communication Personality?
04/28/2011 11:00 AM EDT
How knowing your communication personality can help you be a more effective communicator in your personal and business life.  More details to follow

Godly Communication
05/26/2011 11:00 AM EDT
It takes 21 days to make a habit; why not make one for God? I challenge you: Make a habit to speak in a more godly way and see what you reap and what you sow. I’ll show you how.  Details to follow

Six Ways to Be a Bad Conversationalist
06/30/2011 11:00 AM EDT
Based on my popular article of the same name, I’ll share the conversation mistakes people make and how to avoid them.  More details to follow

How to Teach Communication Skills to Your Children
07/06/2011 11:00 AM EDT
Homeschoolers are usually on the cutting edge of education, using the most creative and fun curricula for teaching even the most intimidating subjects. One subject even most homeschoolers don’t teach is speech communication. Learn some fun ways to teach your PreK-High Schooler the skills they’ll need to master the art of eloquence that studies show can help them in almost every aspect of life!  More details to follow

How to join us live:
Visit: http://www.talkshoe.com/tc/19736
Or Phone in: (724) 444-7444 Call ID: 19736

How to listen in after the live seminar:
Visit: http://www.talkshoe.com/tc/19736
Click on the orange “Listen” button

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Classical Music Speech Challenge

How did you all do last week with your impromptu speech?  What topic did you choose?  Please share your experience!  This is the last week of the challenge and we are going to step it up one more time.  But I know you are all up to it!

This week, I want you to put what you learned this month together and give an impromptu speech on one of the fun topics listed below.  This time also watch that you are loud enough for those in the back of the room to hear you and that you aren’t rushing through your speech.  Maintain good eye contact with your audience and have fun with your topic!  Show your personality!

Suggested Topics:

1. The importance of classical music

2. Pick a classical composer and share why you like his music

3. Explain why they say you learn better with classical music playing in the background

4. Explain why you believe classical music is boring

For more fun with speech communication, check out these fun Art of Eloquence studies:

Say What You Mean: A Creative Speech Course

Know Your Audience

Say What You Mean: Defending the Faith

Say What You Mean: The Language of Leadership

Say What You Mean: Debating the Issues

If you liked these mini lessons, you’ll love our newsletter!  We will be offering 4 mini speech communication lessons form each of six Art of Eloquence studies this year, but ONLY for our newsletter subscribers!

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