Disturbing decline in any interest in communicating well

StormFor quite some time, studies have shown that there has been a significant decline in communication effectiveness.  College professors report an increase in papers with text speak, slang and poor grammar.  Employers have reported a serious lack of communication skill in their new hire candidates and that it’s one of the reasons employees are not promoted.

You and I notice it every day when we speak to people, and chat with them on social media.  Sometimes the lack of communication skill is so apparent we can hardly make out what the person is trying to tell us.

However, it’s not as much a lack of training as it is a lack of interest.  The bottom line is that most people today don’t feel communication is a subject that merits any attention.  Why?

1. Undivided attention is overrated.  Multitasking is a valued skill, but what isn’t generally taken into account is the fact that the less you concentrate on something, the less efficient you are at it.  While you may be able to cook dinner, do the laundry and listen to little Johnny’s story, you probably didn’t catch everything he said.

2. The empowerment movement has told us that we have the right to free speech.  What they have not mentioned is the responsibility we face for the way in which we deliver that speech.  The idea is that I have the right to say whatever I want, but you don’t the right to be offended.  However the opposite is also taught: I have the right to be offended by anything you say and you have to make it up to me.  It’s a curious and unrealistic way to live.

Unfortunately, this is exactly why so many struggle in relationships, marriages and friendships these days. Relationships are all about communication and very few seek to master it these days. I teach communication skills and for the last ten years there has been a decline both in the skills demonstrated and the interest in learning and applying them.  If you’ve found yourself on the receiving end of a misunderstanding, you know what I mean.

It’s time we, as a society, take back the responsibility for what we say and how we say it.  It’s time to learn to speak effectively and in grace.  It’s time to be proactive…because what’s at stake are our relationships!  If you don’t, I can promise you there’s a storm coming!  A miscommunication storm that will leave your relationships in its wake.

Check out ArtofEloquence.com and take your stand now!  We have studies for PreK through adults and for every communication situation from speech and debate to sharing your faith and social skills!

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Communication Lessons from Five Year Olds-Part 4

FIRST A NOTE: I hope you all had a great time at the Birthday Bash yesterday!  I had a ball and learned a LOT from my guest “speakers.”  Due to an infestation of the Gundar Kind (our techie gremlin), we had some techie issues with the coupon code and various other sundry glitches so we are extending our contests and 50% off sale for a day or two until we can work out the details.  That’ll give more of you a chance anyway.  It was a very fun but VERY LONG day. My fingers are still sore for typing 120 words a minute for 12 hours straight.

A BIG thank you to Traci of Your Web Tech Team  for keeping our site up all throughout the Birthday Bash.  I think this is the first time I’ve been to one where the server didn’t crash!  And folks were downloading and posting like crazy!

Another big thank you to my family for putting up with me, or rather NOT putting up with me as I sat here all day and worked.  And especially to my son, Chris for making me lunch.

Okay, here’s the final installment of my article series.

I hope you’ve been enjoying this article series.  To recap if you are just joining the blog, we can learn four very important things about communication from young children.  As we grow and age, we become more sophisticated, but also we lose a lot of our wide eyed innocence which can be extremely helpful in communication with others.

Lesson one shared how we should Speak Plainly.  Lesson two says to Listen Wide-Eyed.  Lesson three is Don’t Let Anyone Distract You.  Here is the final lesson we can learn from five year olds.  Lesson Four: Be Yourself!

Young children are who they are.  They very rarely hide it.  In fact, they don’t know they can and they don”t think they should. Adults learn that in order to be accepted, we need to conform.  In order to be promoted, we may need to comply.  In order to be effective, we may need to play the game.  Let’s face it, if our kids did this, we’d call it pretend.

Adults often loose some of their sense of self as we play the game of life.  We get away from what we want because of what we need.  We move away from who we are in favor of who we think others need us to be.

When I was a kid, I was weird.  “They” called me that.  “They” is the popular kids.  I moved around a lot as a kid and, since I was shy, it was hard to fit in anyway.  However, being different (weird) made it that much more difficult.  I was the one who didn’t have a history with them.  I was the outsider.  I was the one who said “dungarees” instead of “jeans.”  I had a “pocket book” instead of a “purse.”  I loved words and music not designer Sasoon labels (Okay, I just gave away my age there!) and I talked about justice and fairness while my peers talked about boys and beauty.  I was the short one, the creative nerd.

Maybe you felt that way.  Adults thought it was cute when I was young, but as I grew older, I found my peers didn’t agree.  I tried to fit in.  I tried not to be a weirdo.  I didn’t try long because it just didn’t work and I was miserable being someone else.

So I learned very early in life what my daughter calls “Embracing Your Inner Weirdness.”   And when I accepted Jesus, I realized that this is who God created me to be anyway.

Another lesson I learned after studying communication skills for many years is that, while children may want everyone to be the same, adults find that boring.  Adults want to spend time with an individual, but by that time most of us have already spent too many years trying to be someone else.  My advice to you is DON’T.

I’m five foot nuthin’, have an extremely goofy sense of humor, wear thick glasses,  and love purple so much it’s the only color I wear.  It’s me.  It’s who I am and you know what?  People remember me.  They appreciate my creativity.

Don’t be like everyone else.  God created you to be special.  As you go about life trying to live as Christ would have you, also remember to be the person God crated you to be and not a carbon copy of someone else.  He already created someone to be that guy!

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Birthday Bash: 8pm-Art of Eloquence

I’m going to be sharing on the Art of Eloquence Facebook fan page this Birthday Bash half hour.  Here is what Art of Eloquence is offering as a prize for this half hour’s contest:

Art of Eloquence is giving away YOUR choice of any Art of Eloquence eBook to FIVE winners!  FIVE WINNERS will be able to choose ANY communication study from ANY age or subject category!

Choose from PreK, Elmentary, Jr/Sr High, or Adults!  OR…

Choose from our Homeschool Curricula, Leadership, Business, Social Skills, Faith or Speech and Debate!

To win this prize, you will need to subscribe to our newsletterWe’ll be picking five winners from among all the newsletter subscribers and contacting you via email should you be one of our winners!

Don’t forget to subscribe to our newsletter for a chance to win one of five Birthday Bash prizes from Art of Eloquence!  And you might want to subscribe to the blog RSS feed so you don’t miss a contest today!

(DISCLAIMER: Communication FUNdamentals, our blog, normally only posts three times a week (MWF) but today we are having a new post/contest each half hour of the Birthday Bash.)

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Birthday Bash: 2pm-Joyous Home

Theresa Powers from Joyous Home will be sharing on the Art of Eloquence Facebook fan page this Birthday Bash half hour.  Here is what she is offering as a prize for this half hour’s contest:

Their hol­i­day craft­ing and bak­ing issue! In this issue you’ll find home­made every­thing; Christ­mas Cards, Rib­bon Angels, Wrap Skirts, Ice Can­dles, Old Fash­ioned Candy, Hol­i­day Aprons, a Christ­mas Tea with lovely recipes, Pretty pies and a lovely, lovely arti­cle by my friend Tami Kruse on Springerle molds. She has the option of using these to make adorable crayons, we love it! 18pgs.   Value:  $7.00  (Print Issue)

To win this prize, you will need to post a comment to this blog post answering this question:  Name two of your favorite Art of Eloquence studies listed on our Adult’s page!

We’ll be picking a winner from among the correct answers and contacting you via email so make sure you leave your email address on your comment post.

Don’t forget to subscribe to our newsletter for another chance to win a Birthday Bash prize from Art of Eloquence!  And you might want to subscribe to the blog RSS feed so you don’t miss a contest today!

(DISCLAIMER: Communication FUNdamentals, our blog, normally only posts three times a week (MWF) but today we are having a new post/contest each half hour of the Birthday Bash.)

Congratulations to our Winner: Katherine Petty!

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Merry CHRISTmas! Christmas Canon

Merry CHRISTmas everyone!  This is one of my most favorite videos/songs of the season.  It’s the Trans-Siberian Orchestra with Christmas Canon:

Music is a powerful form of communication.  It uses several of your senses and it’s fun.  For more information on fun ways to learn communication skills for preschoolers through adults, visit Art of Eloquence.com!

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Christmas in Sarajevo

Just gorgeous!  Trans-Siberian Orchestra’s Christmas in Sarajevo laser light show!

Music is a powerful form of communication.  It uses several of your senses and it’s fun.  For more information on fun ways to learn communication skills for preschoolers through adults, visit Art of Eloquence.com!

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Celine Dion’s O Holy Night

Celine Dion’s voice is rich and her rendition of O Holy Night is about the best I’ve heard.  It’s spectacular.  Enjoy!

Music is a powerful form of communication.  It uses several of your senses and it’s fun.  For more information on fun ways to learn communication skills for preschoolers through adults, visit Art of Eloquence.com!

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Enya: O Come, O Come Emmanuel

I pray you have been blessed so far by this year’s Video Countdown to CHRISTmas.  This is the second year on the countdown for Enya’s hauntingly beautiful version of O Come, O Come Emmanuel.  Enjoy!

Music videos are a powerful form of communication.  They appeal to several of your senses and are fun.  For more information on fun ways to learn communication skills for preschoolers through adults, visit Art of Eloquence.com!

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Carol of the Bells

This is the second time on the countdown for George Winston’s The Carol of the Bells.  I found this last year!

Music is a powerful form of communication.  It uses several of your senses and it’s fun.  For more information on fun ways to learn communication skills for preschoolers through adults, visit Art of Eloquence.com!

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Celtic Woman: Silent Night

Always a favorite here on the countdown is Celtic Woman’s Silent Night.

Music is a powerful form of communication.  It uses several of your senses and it’s fun.  For more information on fun ways to learn communication skills for preschoolers through adults, visit Art of Eloquence.com!

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