spam

SPAMmers ain’t none to bright!

September 19, 2009 by Art of Eloquence

It’s actually getting easier to tell if something is SPAM or not. SPAMmers aren’t too bright as a bunch or at least they don’t take the time to be too smart. I order lots of stuff online so it can be hard to tell what emails are real order confirmations and what emails are SPAM.

However just last week I received an email that said that my transaction didn’t go through and that this was my last chance to order and get the discount. I looked up at who the email was addressed to and laughed myself silly!

It was addressed to FIMM. Foot in Mouth Man is a fictional character I created to be our mascot here at Art of Eloquence.com so I am 98% sure that he didn’t order anything from Sears! ROFL

For more communication FUN, visit Art of Eloquence.com!

If it weren’t for SPAM…

June 2, 2009 by Art of Eloquence

According to recent SPAM, I’ve won the European Lotto, they know why I’m fat, I need to buy a replica watch and I have a KFC voucher!

You gotta admit SPAM is funny! Sometimes, if it weren’t for SPAM, I’d have nothing to blog about! Well, ok, I guess I’m never at a loss for words, but ya gotta admit SPAM makes great blog fodder! I mean, if it weren’t for SPAM…

* I’d be poor! Do you have any idea how many lotteries I’ve won?! And I’ve never even ENTERED!

* I wouldn’t know why I was fat. In fact, I didn’t even know I WAS!

* I’d have a lot less friends. People from all over the world have contacted me to share their family grief at the loss of their father, the deposed King. I had no idea there were so many kings in the world!

* I’d have no idea about all the new medical technology! Even though I don’t think I own the body parts they say I can enhance.

* I’d get a lot less emails! Now I can boast that I get between 300 and 500 emails a day! That’s impressive, especially when you consider that some of them are in a language I don’t even understand!

* Speaking of new languages, I’m learning so many new ways of speaking English! I had no idea that you could string together a bunch unrelated words and terms! I just can’t figure out what it means!

* If it weren’t for SPAM, well, I just wouldn’t know what to do with all the extra time I’d have!

By the way, do any of you know what Acai is? I accidentally deleted that one! Oh wait…NEVERMIND! While I was typing this six more of them just came in!

Learning communication skills can ALSO be fun! Check out Art of Eloquence.com!

Does your qualifications expire?

February 13, 2009 by Art of Eloquence

I find spam fascinatingly funny. Fortunately for me, my inbox is stocked daily with fascinating bits of miscommunication to keep me occupied. Take this one for example:

“Does your qualifications expire?” (Is that proper Inglish?)

Academic Qualifications available from prestigious NON-ACCREDITED universities. (It’s so prestigious, it’s not accredited?)

Get the prestige that you deserve today!

Move ahead in your career today!

Bachelors, Masters and PhD’s available in your field and have those prestigious letters after your name! (MMM, PhNaD: Master of Misleading Marketing and Prestigious Holder of Non Accredited Documents)

No examinations! No classes! No textbooks! (No prestige!)

Call to register and receive your qualifications within days!

24 hours a day 7 days a week! (to call or to receive “qualifications”?)

Confidentiality assured! (Confidential prestige?)

Phone Number +1 XXX XXX XXXX”

From JoJo’s Purple Crayon
Learning Speech Communication Skills
can ALSO be fun with Art of Eloquence!

SPAMmers ain’t none to bright!

If it weren’t for SPAM…

Does your qualifications expire?

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