Disturbing decline in any interest in communicating well

StormFor quite some time, studies have shown that there has been a significant decline in communication effectiveness.  College professors report an increase in papers with text speak, slang and poor grammar.  Employers have reported a serious lack of communication skill in their new hire candidates and that it’s one of the reasons employees are not promoted.

You and I notice it every day when we speak to people, and chat with them on social media.  Sometimes the lack of communication skill is so apparent we can hardly make out what the person is trying to tell us.

However, it’s not as much a lack of training as it is a lack of interest.  The bottom line is that most people today don’t feel communication is a subject that merits any attention.  Why?

1. Undivided attention is overrated.  Multitasking is a valued skill, but what isn’t generally taken into account is the fact that the less you concentrate on something, the less efficient you are at it.  While you may be able to cook dinner, do the laundry and listen to little Johnny’s story, you probably didn’t catch everything he said.

2. The empowerment movement has told us that we have the right to free speech.  What they have not mentioned is the responsibility we face for the way in which we deliver that speech.  The idea is that I have the right to say whatever I want, but you don’t the right to be offended.  However the opposite is also taught: I have the right to be offended by anything you say and you have to make it up to me.  It’s a curious and unrealistic way to live.

Unfortunately, this is exactly why so many struggle in relationships, marriages and friendships these days. Relationships are all about communication and very few seek to master it these days. I teach communication skills and for the last ten years there has been a decline both in the skills demonstrated and the interest in learning and applying them.  If you’ve found yourself on the receiving end of a misunderstanding, you know what I mean.

It’s time we, as a society, take back the responsibility for what we say and how we say it.  It’s time to learn to speak effectively and in grace.  It’s time to be proactive…because what’s at stake are our relationships!  If you don’t, I can promise you there’s a storm coming!  A miscommunication storm that will leave your relationships in its wake.

Check out ArtofEloquence.com and take your stand now!  We have studies for PreK through adults and for every communication situation from speech and debate to sharing your faith and social skills!

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Birthday Bash: 8pm-Art of Eloquence

I’m going to be sharing on the Art of Eloquence Facebook fan page this Birthday Bash half hour.  Here is what Art of Eloquence is offering as a prize for this half hour’s contest:

Art of Eloquence is giving away YOUR choice of any Art of Eloquence eBook to FIVE winners!  FIVE WINNERS will be able to choose ANY communication study from ANY age or subject category!

Choose from PreK, Elmentary, Jr/Sr High, or Adults!  OR…

Choose from our Homeschool Curricula, Leadership, Business, Social Skills, Faith or Speech and Debate!

To win this prize, you will need to subscribe to our newsletterWe’ll be picking five winners from among all the newsletter subscribers and contacting you via email should you be one of our winners!

Don’t forget to subscribe to our newsletter for a chance to win one of five Birthday Bash prizes from Art of Eloquence!  And you might want to subscribe to the blog RSS feed so you don’t miss a contest today!

(DISCLAIMER: Communication FUNdamentals, our blog, normally only posts three times a week (MWF) but today we are having a new post/contest each half hour of the Birthday Bash.)

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Influence of Texting on Communication Skills

Communication FUNdamentals continues its celebration of Effective Communication Month!  Last week we looked at the history of communication technology.  Today, I’d like to talk about how that change in communication can affect the quality of our communication.

The Influence of Texting on Effective Communication Skills

By JoJo Tabares

 

“Nd U 2 gt rpt 2me by fri5. Bob”

Can you imagine receiving this email from a high level manager at a major corporation?  What would you think of the company who sent this to you, their customer?  If you think this is a an exaggeration, guess again!    Many researchers believe that texting and email have contributed to the drastic decrease in effective communication skills of this generation.  In this article, I am going to cover how texting and email have caused our skills to deteriorate even in the corporate world, how laziness has helped to increase miscommunication, how the impersonal nature of technological communication has increased rudeness and aggression, and hampered our friendships and other social skills.  Lastly, I’m going to share some tips that will help you and your children avoid these pitfalls increasing your chances of success in your personal and professional life.

1. Bad Communication Skills Even in Corporate America:
“Communication is all anyone ever gets paid for ultimately…and if you cannot effectively communicate, you will pay…not get paid!” -Doug Firebaugh

According to a 2005 article in the Pittsburg Post Gazette, employers are complaining about communication skills. Bosses say the biggest failing among college graduates/job applicants is the inability to speak and write effectively.  Communication skills now top the list of qualities employers seek because these are qualities they cannot teach in their two week new-hire training sessions. But these qualities are consistently at the bottom of the list perspective employees possess at the interview.  According to the National Association of Colleges and Employers, good communication skills were what employers said was most lacking in college job candidates.

Debra Vargulish is a training administrator at the Latrobe-based global tooling company who recruits on college campuses for Kennametal Inc.  She reported that the students she meets are often inarticulate and shy, “They seem to be way better at using technology than older people. It’s actually the content that is missing.  A lot of them don’t know what to say at all, and that’s not good.”

In my lifetime, technology has been nothing short of amazing!  It has had some incredibly powerful influences on our ability to communicate.  We are able to communicate with almost anyone around the world at the stroke of a key.  We can find information in a nano second. Email and texting allow us convenient access to our friends on our schedule, give us a simple way to connect and pass along vital information, and help family and friends remain close even though they are hundreds of miles apart.  However, texting and email has also been cited as a reason communication skills have deteriorated in recent years.  The use of email shorthand is one of the reasons stated.  According to a recent study, 25% have used emoticons in their school writing; 50% have used informal punctuation and grammar; 38% have used text shortcuts such as “LOL” meaning “laugh out loud”.

“The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.” -Hubert H. Humphrey 

In a recent Harris Interactive and Teenage Research Unlimited survey, researchers found that instant messaging keeps families interconnected online, but can also lead to fewer in-person meetings, outings and less time actually talking. He said the data collected showed communicating online can be overused and is beginning to replace real-life relationships with virtual ones.

“You can have brilliant ideas, but if you can’t get them across, your ideas won’t get you anywhere.” -Lee Iacocca

2. People are getting lazy with info and not used to checking things out or thinking things through:

With so much information (and misinformation) a click away, many no longer do their due diligence to make sure they are passing along information that is accurate.  Passing along misinformation can not only create a panic where none need exist but it can also destroy your credibility.  I’ve seen large Facebook groups predicated on an untruth.  When the group leaders find out their cause is invalid their group members have a hard time trusting them with any other information.

Laziness causes poor attention spans and writing skills as well.  A recent story in the New York Times about the negative effects of text messaging reported statistics from the Nielsen Company showing teenagers in the United States averaged about 80 text messages per day in the fourth quarter of 2008.  Text messages allow teenagers to communicate in places where cell phones are not allowed, primarily school. It’s fairly easy to hide a cell phone and text, and texting teenagers aren’t focusing on the lesson and a decreased attention span ensues.  According to the University of Alabama computers and applied Technology Program 2009, “Technology Education: A Series of Case Studies,” Mrs. Diego’s 9th grade English student papers are fraught with short, choppy sentences that give no depth.

Further, many teens spend so much time texting, they are not aware of the proper uses of words or phrases and are not used to thinking things through.  Here’s something I heard in the park the other day.  A 14 y/o girl told her 4 y/o step sister, “Your soon-to-be father-in-law is on a plane right now.”  As I listened to the conversation that followed where the older girl repeatedly used this term, it appeared that the 14 y/o was probably talking about her father who was going to adopt her step sister.

3. Increase in Rudeness and aggression:

According to Christina Durano, “Social Skills Impeded by Technology,” DailySkiff.com, “Not only do electronics hinder the development of our interpersonal communication skills, but they can also be just plain rude. Sometimes I want to grab the phone out of someone’s hands and throw it on the ground so they actually look at me during our conversation. It’s not that I think I’m so high and mighty that I actually deserve people’s attention; it’s just that there are some basic rights everyone deserves – one of which is the right to have a two-way conversation.”

Have you noticed how inconsiderate some movie goers are lately?  You can’t step into a movie theater anymore without encountering a sea of cell phones backlit as their owners thumb their way through endless online games or beep-ridden text messaging.  And don’t get me started on the increased aggression on forums, Yahoo groups and chats due to the anonymity of the faceless, impersonal connections made online.  People feel justified in expressing anger and voicing disrespect because they don’t have to look their victims in the eye when they communicate it.

4. Hampering Friendships and social skills
There are severe disadvantages to the influence of technology on interpersonal communication.  In our zest to connect with people all over the globe, we often neglect our own neighbors.  Togetherness is being neglected in contradiction to the basic survival instinctual behaviors. People won’t see any need to be more physically interactive.  Already it is possible to perform major activities without physical interaction — it’s even possible to exercise or engage in sporting activities with a virtual competitor.

Because of the increase in text messaging and email, some experts like Rick Pukis, an Associate Professor of Communications at Augusta State University, say texting could be affecting the way we interact.

“Text messaging has made us a very impersonal society today. They’re not communicating, not using any facial expressions, like smiling so when they get back into a situation where they’re talking to someone, they don’t smile,” said Pukis.

“Someone can whip one out in thirty seconds and they’re like, ‘Ahh, I took care of this, I communicated. You didn’t really communicate, you just shot out a one line sentence over to me and didn’t really convey any thoughts,” said Pukis.

My niece recently attended a friend’s birthday party and found herself in the middle of a texting marathon.  Each girl, cell phone in hand, was texting the boys who were not present at the party and each other even though they were in the room with each other for several hours!

5. What to do?

In order for you and your family to avoid these pitfalls which can result in a serious lack of effective communication skills that can hamper your personal and professional success in life, I recommend you don’t overlook studying communication skills.  Art of Eloquence has a wealth of information on our site dedicated to your success.

The Lord tells us in Proverbs 25:11, “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.” And remember that, “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” -George Bernard Shaw

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JoJo Tabares holds a degree in Speech Communication, but it is her humorous approach to communication skills which has made her a highly sought-after Christian speaker and writer.  Her articles appear in homeschool publications, such as Homeschool Enrichment Magazine and The Old Schoolhouse Magazine, which also endorses her Say What You Mean curricula.  You can also find JoJo on web sites such as Crosswalk.com and Dr.Laura.com.  For more information on communication FUNdamentals and Christian-based communication skills for the whole family, please visit http://www.ArtofEloquence.com

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