Test Your Communication Skill Level

I hope you enjoyed Communication Effectiveness Month.  We talked about how communication skills affect just about every aspect of our lives from our parenting to our marriages and from our friendships to our careers.  If you’d like to assess your communication skills, here is a communication quiz I designed years ago.  I’ve copied part of it here, but you’ll see a link to the rest of it at the bottom of this post.

Communication Assessment Quiz

Check your CEQ: Communication Effectiveness Quotient.

1. How often do you feel intimidated by someone?
Always Often Occasionally Rarely Never

2. How often does intimidation prevent you from speaking up?
Always Often Occasionally Rarely Never

3. Do you shy away from conflict?
Always Often Occasionally Rarely Never

4. How often do you find it difficult to get your point across?
Always Often Occasionally Rarely Never

5. Do you find yourself angry with little idea of how to express yourself?
Always Often Occasionally Rarely Never

6. Are you ineffective in diffusing another’s anger?
Always Often Occasionally Rarely Never

7. Do you feel you are ineffective in getting what you want?
Always Often Occasionally Rarely Never

To finish the quiz, click here!

If you’ve identified an area that you’d like some help with, visit our website for a listing of various communication topics and age groups!

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Homeschool Question#4 "Do you KNOW anything?"

Today is Memorial Day so I’d like to start off by saying thank you to all our military and their families and to honor all those who gave the ultimate sacrifice to keep us free!

The last Monday of the month is usually reserved for your comments and questions.  This Monday is a bit different in that I’m going to focus on the one question I have received over the years from homeschoolers.  It fits right in with my “A Question of Homeschooling” series of articles so this week I’d like to help homeschoolers answer the question, “Do you KNOW anything?”

One of the issues homeschoolers have to deal with is the random quizzing of our children and the questions that reflect their ‘concern’ that our children aren’t really learning anything.  I remember walking through the store or a park when someone found out we homeschooled.  Turning to my dd, they began asking her a series of questions…

“What’s 12 x 12?”

“Name the capital of Venezuela?”

“When did World War II begin?”

“Explain the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics?”

“How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?”

My dd was able to answer all of the questions folks flung at her, but she often felt like she was a contestant on Jeopardy!  It gave her some amount of stress, especially when she was young.  It can be a little unnerving for the parent as well.  You stand there wondering how long you should let this go on before you say something.  And what do you say?  “Stop quizzing my kid, she’s not a performing monkey!”

I usually would allow a question or two and then cut it short saying we had to go.  Sometimes the Quiz Master would make a comment to imply she wasn’t able to handle the interrogation, er… I mean, conversation.   Then I felt it  appropriate (read that justified) to quip, “Well, if she’d known there was a test today, she would have studied.”

Once a man began quizzing my son in the same way.  He didn’t want to let it go and made some comment which, in essence, spoke of my son’s inferior education.  I explained to him that, though my son spoke quite well, he was only in the second grade!

I have never understood the need to quiz my children. I doubt very much anyone has ever quizzed public schooled children this way!  Can you imagine the look on the parent’s face if a man had said, “Oh, you’re in public school?  What’s the capital of Venezuela?”   When I run into someone who feels the need to do this and he is not satisfied with one of my previous answers, I have taken a few minutes to point this out along with the fact that studies show that homeschooled students consistently score higher academically than public or private schooled students.

What’s important is to try to do this with as little indignation as possible.  I know it’s easier said than done when your children have been called ignorant to their face, but do try.  If you don’t, you run the risk of appearing wounded and that gives him more ammunition for future homeschoolers he encounters. (He could take this as, “The truth hurts, eh, Mrs. Homeschooler!)

Lastly, it is important to talk with your children about the encounter to assure they don’t feel belittled by this man.  Their self-esteem is important and one little careless remark by a stranger can have a big impact on a child.

Now, you may be wondering about the question which titles today’s article and you can’t believe anyone would say such a thing to a child.  I’ll tell you the story as it was relayed to me by my dd’s friend.  Apparently she was at a family event (I think she was about 13 at the time) when an older man (friend of a family member) started a conversation with her and found she was homeschooled all her life.  He looked at her and replied, “Well, do you KNOW anything?

When someone asks if my kids ‘know anything’ or imply that I am an easy teacher because I’m my kids’ mom, I relate a story of my own.  My children are gifted.  When I brought my dd home from private school in the 5th grade, she was used to being the smartest one in the class. So much so that her teachers never made her prove it.  They often took less than her best work and praised her for it.  I made her do her best.  I insisted on it.  Though she read on an adult level by the 3rd grade and spoke like a 45 y/o when she was 6, she wrote like a first grader in the fifth grade!  I made her rewrite her papers…several times!!  In the first year of homeschool, my dd made up a chant for me called “Mean Mommy.”  There was a clap and a dance that went with it.  She taught it to her brother and they’d both run around the house chanting, “Mean Mommy” (clap clap) “Mean Mommy!”  (clap clap).

After my dd was accepted to Vanderbilt University, I asked her about Mean Mommy.  She said she was grateful for Mean Mommy today!  So I guess she does know something!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
JoJo Tabares holds a degree in Speech Communication, but it is her humorous approach to communication skills which has made her a highly sought-after Christian speaker and writer.  Her articles appear in homeschool publications, such as Homeschool Enrichment Magazine and The Old Schoolhouse Magazine, which also endorses her Say What You Mean curricula, including Say What You Mean Defending the Faith.  You can also find JoJo on web sites such as Crosswalk.com and Dr.Laura.com and hosting her weekly podcast, Communication Comedy Network.  For more information on communication FUNdamentals and Christian-based communication skills for the whole family, please visit http://www.ArtofEloquence.com

Stay tuned next Monday for more in my article series, “A Question of Homeschooling” when I will share another answer to a typical question homeschoolers are asked.

If you have a question you are frequently asked and would like me to include it in my blog series, please post a comment here or email me at jojo @ artofeloquence.com

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It’s December. Now how did THAT happen? lol

Ok so it’s December 1st, 2009.  Wasn’t it just January?  Come to think of it…wasn’t it just 1995…about two years ago?  The older I get, the faster time goes by.  As my father always says, “Tempus certainly does fugit!”  They say time flies when you’re having fun, but I don’t remember having THAT much fun!

So how does this happen?  How do you go from being a young girl without a care in the world one moment to a 47 year old mother of a college girl and a homeschooled 10 y/o son the next?  As Lucy used to say, “Whahappen?”

So Christmas must be around 2 oclock today and 2010 is probably being held on Friday!  Are you ready? I’m not!  But I did spend a few millennia yesterday evening creating a really adorable CHRISTmas gift for all our newsletter subscribers and Facebook Fans.  It’s called “God is Everywhere.”   I will be unveiling it in about a week so, if you are not a subscriber or a fan club member, go directly to Sign Up or become a FAN!  Do not pass go!  Do not collect $200!

How fast does time fly for you?  Here’s a little quiz to help you along:

What year were you born-if you care to answer? (JoJo was born in 1962.)

What year were you married? (1987   That used to sound like 10 yrs ago!)

How old are your kids? (19 and 10)

How old were they yesterday? (15 and 6)

How old will they be tomorrow? (40 and 31)

I now return you to your life in progress…QUICK!  You might miss something!

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5 Facebook Things About Me

All this week I’m talking about social networking with Facebook.  One of the things that dominate Facebook are the quizzes and 5 Things About Me!   Some people love them and some try to avoid them like the plague.  lol  But since it is part of the culture of Facebook, I thought I’d do my own Facebook Quiz or 5 Facebook Things About Me.

Feel free to post your answers here as a blog comment.  If you want, you can post your answers on your Facebook page and reference this blogpost.

Facebook Quiz/5 Facebook Things About Me

1. What is listed in your Facebook Bio?

2. Do you take Facebook Quizzes?

3. Do you like the Facebook applications? Have you ever given anyone a virtual flower or gift?

4. Do you use Facebook to meet new people or to communicate with those you already know?

5.  How many Facebook groups or fan clubs do you belong to?

I’ll post mine in a comment just as soon as this posts.

By the way, if you’re on Facebook, I’d love to connect with you! You’ll find me here!

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Extra! Breaking Word News w/Dr. Word Wielder!

Extra!!  Extra!!  Breaking Word News!!

This just in from the Rather Be Writing blog!  Dr. Word Wielder has a special word lesson for you over on Rather Be Writing today!  Dr. Word Wielder is the most articulate word teacher on the net.  Here are Dr. Word Wielder’s Quick Quiz Questions:

“The quandary can be quelled by calculating the qualifying answers and inserting them into a post in your que of blog entries. Then the readers shall reappear here to respond with a link to the web address wherein you have posted your response to these questions. Return again and read the Exam Explanations and Answers which I shall record on this page in a day or so.


1. Hectic or Helpful Homonyms. The Egyptians were ruled by a (farrow or pharaoh) who sat on a (thrown, throne) chair. Pick the correct homonym for the sentence to make sense.


2. Ideal or Idiotic Idioms. The musician who won the national finals at the Gospel Music Association (A. forgot himself OR B. went off the deep end) when he heard his name announced over the public address system. Choose the correct idiom.


3. Wise or Wacky Words. Automaton. Is it: A. Automatic matching OR B. a robot or mechanical person? Select the proper definition.


4. Comical or Cute Coinage. Editoreyesis. When one’s eyes insist on noticing grammatical errors almost everywhere his or her eyes look, making general reading more like an editing experience. People with this condition tend to be hardest on themselves.”

You may post your answers here or go to Dr. Word Wielder’s post and answer them there.  He will be posting the answers in a day or two so do check back with him to see how well you did!   I’ll answer in just a moment.

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Short Quiz

Are you one of the few people who does not need to hone your communication skills?  Take this short quiz to find out:

1. Are you breathing?

If you answered “no” to ANY of these questions, further study on effective communication skills is not necessary for your success.

The rest of you join me over at Art of Eloquence and let’s have some fun with speech communication skills!

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