Breast Cancer AWAREness?

Continuing with my series, “What Does Your _____ Say About You?” Here is another article I wrote a while back that addresses the example we set and what we communicate even if it’s for a good cause.  What Does Your Post Say About You?

Breast Cancer AWAREness?

by JoJo Tabares

Every year around this time, I receive an inordinate number of private messages from Facebook friends about Breast Cancer Awareness. So many apparently see this as a fun way to promote a worthy cause, the elimination of breast cancer which affects many women, so why do I have such a problem with it?

1. It does NOT promote awareness.

A few years ago I was asked to post the color of my bra. Another year I was asked to post where I like to keep my purse. This year I was asked to post a tiny heart symbol. You are ONLY supposed to post the answer, but not explain what it means–even when someone asks.

Most people have no idea it has anything to do with breast cancer and those who already know because they got the insider personal message from one of their Facebook friends, already know. If they don’t know, they are afraid to ask, so…how does this benefit breast cancer awareness?

2. What it so often DOES promote is frustration, embarrassment and inappropriate comments.

The first year I was exposed to this, I had no idea what it was. I saw a bunch of my friends posting, “red,” “blue,” “yellow with pink polka dots.” So naturally, I posted a comment, “What is yellow with pink polka dots?” I received a PM a few hours later explaining what it was and asking me to post what color my bra was. I’m sorry, but the color of my bra is between me, my husband and God. I really don’t feel comfortable sharing that with the general public.

The year they asked you to post where you like to keep your purse, I saw an increase in the number of mutual male friends who had one of two responses to, “I like it on the counter!” or “I like it on the kitchen table!” One was utter embarrassment either to the mere image it conjured up or to the response they received if they innocently asked what it meant.

The other response men typically have to sexual innuendo is lewd comments. I’m not going to post any of them here, but I’m sure you know what I mean. Men are visual creatures when it comes to this subject. The mere mention of something that smacks of a sexual image, is enough to illicit (or should that be elicit) comments that shouldn’t be repeated in mixed company. As Christians, isn’t it our duty not to tempt men to stumble?

Breast cancer is a serious disease affecting not only thousands of women, but their families as well. A friend recently told me that she wondered if people whose lives were affected by breast cancer felt as if these “Green”, “On the counter,” and cutsie heart symbols were making light of their loss. If you’ve been a reader of Communication FUNdamentals for any length of time, you know how much I love to joke, but there are times when it just seems wrong. In my mind, these postings do not serve to inform or educate and have an incredible potential for miscommunication, embarrassment and to promote inappropriate comments.

So this season, why not just post a pink ribbon and say, ”This month is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.” Then post a link to Breast Cancer.org where you can get more information.

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JoJo Tabares holds a degree in Speech Communication, but it is her humorous approach to communication skills which has made her a highly sought-after Christian speaker and writer. Her articles appear in homeschool publications, such as Homeschool Enrichment Magazine and The Old Schoolhouse Magazine, which also endorses her Say What You Mean curricula. You can also find JoJo on web sites such as Crosswalk.com and Dr.Laura.com. For more information on communication FUNdamentals and Christian-based communication skills for the whole family, please visit http://www.ArtofEloquence.com

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Are you a good Christian Example on Facebook?

I’m starting a new series on the blog called, “What Does Your _____ Say About You?” I’m going to highlight some of the things we may not think about when we consider communication. However, this is especially important as we consider what kind of Christain example we are as we go through our day.  Here is an article I wrote a while back for Examiner.com.  So…What does your Facebook Page Say About You?

Are You  a Good Christian Example on Facebook?

By JoJo Tabares

But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth.” -Acts 1:8

I’m probably preaching to the choir, but maybe you could pass this along.  I see so many friend requests from people on Facebook who, with their words, declare they are Christian, but with their profile picture, posts and the fan pages they “like” say otherwise.  Once you declare yourself a Christian, the world is watching and judging.  Are you a good example (witness) of Christ in your corner of the Facebook neighborhood?

1. Sultry Eyes

They say the eyes are the windows to the soul.  Your profile picture is sometimes the only thing a prospective Facebook friend can see.  Make sure it’s a good representation.  Oh most people do go to the trouble of making sure they look nice.  They only put up a picture that caught them on a good hair day, but did your profile picture catch you on a good soul day?  Does your picture say, “I’m sexy?”  Do your eyes suggest you are looking for a relationship or do they really only suggest you are looking for one thing?  Are you wearing your Sunday best or your bikini?  Are you enticing men with your expression or are you displaying a friendly demeanor?  Remember, ladies.  Men are visual creatures.  This is why God put this verse in His Word:

In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.” -1 Timothy 2:9-10

2. Foul Language

Yes, as strange as this sounds, I often seen professing Christians reply to people who disagree with them using foul language.  In fact, I have seen a professing Christian reply to people she did agree with this way too!  Foul language, especially from women, is not something that even today’s secular society accepts.  All too often, I see men using foul language in public, around women and children.  Such a thing wasn’t acceptable when I was a young girl.  Now it is commonplace.  Somehow, though, seeing it in print (or text as the case may be) is just a bit more crude and shocking especially coming from a man or woman of God.

3. Suggestive Pictures

My office is also where my son does his school work.  From his desk, he can see over his computer to mine and I can’t tell you how many times a Christian Facebook friend has shocked me by posting a picture of a woman draped in only a sheet or…LESS!  Even if I didn’t have little eyes peering over at me, I don’t have any desire to see these kinds of pictures.  If I see this type of thing while responding to a friend request, I don’t accept.  However, when I see this type of thing after I accept and saw that this person proclaims Christianity, I am saddened at the example this person is setting for his/her friends and friends of friends.

4. Un-Christian by Association

Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you.” -2 Corinthians 6:14-17

Christianity isn’t a smorgasbord and it doesn’t live in a vacuum.   How we act, what we say and who we associate ourselves with set an example for those who are watching.  If you profess Christianity, yet post pictures from a group you belong to that has foul language in its title, what type of example are you setting?  If you think, nobody will notice, you’re wrong.  What happens when someone really likes that picture and wants to check out where it came from or share it on their wall?   Like it or not, by posting a picture shared from a group like this, you are actually communicating that you endorse it—even if you don’t.

Facebook is an online party.  You may not realize it, but you’re building a reputation in a public place.  We need to be a good, Christian example or we invite others to stumble in their faith.  I submit to you that not being careful of your public reputation can also stumble your own faith.  You can’t claim Christianity and then act as if you are part of the world.  It doesn’t wash.  I’ve heard some say they do and say these things in order to relate better with unbelievers.  However, I want you to consider that most of the time when we compromise what we know is right, it’s not the unbeliever who is influenced.  It is us.

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JoJo Tabares holds a degree in Speech Communication, but it is her humorous approach to communication skills which has made her a highly sought-after Christian speaker and writer.  Her articles appear in homeschool publications, such as Homeschool Enrichment Magazine and The Old Schoolhouse Magazine, which also endorses her Say What You Mean curricula.  You can also find JoJo on web sites such as Crosswalk.com and Dr.Laura.com.  For more information on communication FUNdamentals and Christian-based communication skills for the whole family, please visit http://www.ArtofEloquence.com

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If you liked this post, read…Seven Reasons Why YOU Should Sign Up for the Art of Eloquence Newsletter!

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