How to Communicate Love Part4: How do you know?

dumb questionPulling this month’s blog series all together, here’s what we learned from this blog series so far:

Words don’t always communicate love, but specific details communicate love more effectively.

Actions communicate love.

Thoughtful, personalized, and even inexpensive gifts can communicate more love.

How do you determine what your spouse considers showing love? Listen!

1. Listen to the comments your spouse makes when he/she receives a gift.  Listen to what they don’t say.  Read between the lines.

2. ASK!  Trust me when I say that it doesn’t ruin the mystery if you go right up to her and ask what kinds of ways she likes to feel your love.  It doesn’t destroy the space/time continuum if you ask your husband how he feels love from you.  Ask and ye shall receive…the knowledge you need!

3. Pay attention.  Pay attention to the little things your spouse does.  Garner clues from the comments they make either about others or themselves.  Did she just say she thought it was adorable how the husband in that movie did something for his wife?  Did he just make a comment that gave you a clue about what he needs?  Pay attention.

There are as many ways to communicate love as there are lovers.  In order to find what works for your spouse, you need to listen, ask and pay attention.  Use words, actions and gifts and strategically tailor them to your spouse.

Happy Valentine’s Day…all year long!

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Don’t forget to check out our Valentine Special where you can get two e-books that will help you and your spouse build a happier and stronger relationship!  Plus our free bonus gift, 28 Days of Love: 28 scriptures, sayings and beautiful illustrations that will help you become better able to express your love for your spouse.  It can be Valentine’s Day all year long!

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How to Communicate Love Part2: Actions

SuperManLast week we looked at communicating love with the words we use, but there are so many other ways to communicate love!  We often don’t even have to say a word to show someone that we love them.  Here are just a few ways:

1. Hugs

A hug is a love language most people understand.  Sometimes no words are necessary.  The hug has healing powers.  It transforms empty words into a feeling like nothing else can.

And how long should a hug last?  A quick hug is what guys do for each other.  They don’t want to linger too long over a hug with another man.  But a hug between spouses should last longer than it takes to regain your manhood.

Hugging and cuddling should be a regular part of your communication with your spouse.  Have you hugged your spouse today?

2. What we do

Nothing says I love you like gas!  No really.  My dh always fills my car up with gas.  We’ve been married 26 yrs and I can count on my fingers the number of times I have filled up my tank.  He does this so I don’t have to go out and so I always have enough gas to get me where I need to go.

I’m sure he doesn’t enjoy getting me gas.  After all, he has to do it for his own car as well.  But the fact that he takes the time to do things he doesn’t really want to do so that I don’t have to do it, just makes me feel warm and fuzzy all over.  What about you?  What does your spouse do for you that makes you feel his/her love?

3. Offer to help

Another way we can communicate love to our spouse or others is to offer to help with something.  Ever have a need that someone offered to help with by supplying you with the money to do whatever it was you needed to do?  I’m sure that was appreciated, but don’t you appreciate it more if the person took the time to come help?

Ideas:

Offering to bring over a meal when someone is sick.

Doing the dishes for the wife when she is tired.

Offering to take the kids for a few hours so someone can rest.

Helping an elderly neighbor clean her house or offering to do it yourself.

Actions speak louder than words and they often convey more than just, “I love you.”  Be someone’s superhero!  But there are other ways to communicate love. Check back next week for part 3.

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Don’t forget to check out our Valentine Special where you can get two e-books that will help you and your spouse build a happier and stronger relationship!  Plus our free bonus gift, 28 Days of Love: 28 scriptures, sayings and beautiful illustrations that will help you become better able to express your love for your spouse.

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If you liked this post, read…Seven Reasons Why YOU Should Sign Up for the Art of Eloquence Newsletter!

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