By JoJo Tabares
As so many of us scramble to make ends meet, we have become a nation of caffeine-addicted rushers. We’re late! We’re late! For a very important date! No time to say hello, goodbye. We’re late! We’re late! We’re late!
A bunch of Alice in Wonderland White Rabbits, we race from one thing to the next and seldom slow down enough to really understand what’s going on around us. We can’t. We don’t have time! As Willy Wonka stated, “I have so much time and so little to do! Strike that. Reverse it!”
With so little time and so much to do, we find ourselves becoming a nation of skimmers. We skim through our emails and even our conversations. We listen with our “To Do” List running through our brains and we miss half of what is said. That gets us into some hot water when we either miss an important piece of information or Aunt Mildred’s upset because we were only pretending to listen to her.
So how do you know if you’ve become a skimmer? How do you know when it’s gotten so bad and you are missing so much that your relationships are suffering? Well, fortunately, I’ve developed a test. Of course it’s written in my own comedic style…and, as Wonka also said, “A little nonsense now and then…” Here are seven ways to tell if you’re a …SKIMMER!
1. If you have ever run into a friend on the street and, as she’s talking, you begin planning your dinner menu for the week and when you get to Thursday you realize you are nodding to NO ONE…you might be a skimmer.
2. If you have ever read an email three times for the first time…you might be a skimmer.
3. If you have ever had a conversation with someone who repeatedly says, “I just said that.”…you might be a skimmer.
4. If you have ever shown up to a party on the wrong date…you might be a skimmer.
5. If you have found yourself at a black tie affair dressed in blue jeans…you might be a skimmer.
6. If you have had a conversation with your mother about several emails she sent you and find only half of it even vaguely familiar…you might be a skimmer.
7. If you ever had a one-hour, in-depth conversation with someone after which you not only couldn’t remember who it was with, but what you talked about…you might be a skimmer.
Skimming can be dangerous to your information and your relationships. Believe it or not, skimming actually costs you more time to do things over again than you saved by skimming in the first place. Slow down, America!
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JoJo Tabares holds a degree in Speech Communication. Her Christian and humorous approach to communication skills has made her a sought after speaker. JoJo’s articles have appeared in various homeschool magazines and websites such as Dr. Laura.com. Her Say What You Mean curricula is endorsed by The Old Schoolhouse Magazine and her eBook, Say What You Mean When You’re in Business, has been used by direct sales leaders and small business owners alike. For more information, please visit http://www.ArtofEloquence.com
I love this article. Don’t think I am really a skimmer for the most part. More like an elephant, but I have these experiences with people all the time and it really makes me feel like they are not interested in me, so why bother with them.
A very insightful comment, Kathy! This is one of the reasons this can cost us a friendship. I wrote about this an another article a while back. Skimming feels like we don’t value them enough to pay attention to them. Doing it once is easily forgivable, but doing it consistently can cost a friendship. I’ve seen it too many times. People can forgive a mistake. What people have a hard time with is intent. Consistently treating our friends as if they aren’t worth paying attention to is often translated this way.
Good points, JoJo. It reminds me of a man I once worked with whose favorite saying was, “It’s strange that people don’t have time to do something right the first time, but they have time to do it over.”
I’m guilty. . . OCCASIONALLY. Blame my ADD. HAH! Actually, blame the fact that I am usually too busy to pay much attention and that’s sad. I really DO try to pay attention, especially to other people. I think it’s the epitome of rude to be interacting with someone and have your mind off somewhere else. I have known people who, in a conversation, make you feel like you are the only person in the room, even though there may be thousands. That is how I would like to treat people always. Indeed, Slow down, America!
Exactly,Donna!! Good points, Carla and thanks for the RT!
JoJo,
Uh-oh. I may have become a skimmer.
Too much to do and so little time! I made a statement recently that I wish I could tack another decade onto my life, and another couple of hours onto every day.
Time to slow down. Thanks for an excellent reminder!
Oh wow – this is SO funny – SO TRUE!! I think I might be guilty of being a skimmer – that one about showing up to something on the wrong date – Oh WOW – my friend Denise Gormley would have a HUGE laugh at my expense – and the one about the emails and conversation with my mother – oh boy – I’m guilty of that too!!
Yes, I’m guilty too, sometimes. I wish life could slow down but it will eventually do it whether I do or not. Life has a way of doing that to us. It’s important, though, to take time to communicate with our friends. They are worth the time we take to slow down and show them they are important.
Me too. I’m guilty of several of these! Part of my problem is trying to rely on memory. If I write stuff down—and REMEMBER TO LOOK at it again—I do much better.
I hear ya folks. I know how being busy keeps us skimming. I have to remind myself every day to be careful. But it’s sooo worth it when someone smiles because you noticed.
JoJo I knew I was a skimmer when I got to Aunt Mildred. That was a great article. And very true. I’ll just bet when I finally slow down and take time to really listen, I might just find I like what I hear. I agree that it is not a good way to be. Thankfully most of the people in my life are very patient with me and love me anyway, but you know after a while that Alice in Wonderland rabbit became very annoying. HMMMM.