Art of Eloquence

If you build it and they come, then what?

April 23, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

In the movie, Field of Dreams, Kevin Costner’s character heard, “If you build it, they will come.” He built it and they came. They came…in droves. The movie ends there…now what?

I remember watching the end of this movie wondering what they would do now. What would they charge? How would they collect the money? What if someone could see it from the road and didn’t want to pay? Where would all those hundreds of fans stay after the game?

So many adopted this tag line after that movie came out. If you build it, they will come. I remember an internet marketer who began using it as a way of letting his clients know that it didn’t end there for websites either. If you build a website, they won’t come until you advertise it. And many a marketing guru tells us that once they do come, we have to have our websites ready for them to entice them to order and to have a reason to come back.

So, if you build a blog and they come…and comment, what now? If you build a fan page and they come…and comment, now what? And if you build an online community and they come…and comment, what do we do now? We REPLY! Why? Because if you build it and they come and comment and you don’t respond, they will LEAVE!

If you post a bunch of things on your Facebook wall, blog, website, community, it’s just as if you were having a conversation with someone at a party. If you begin a conversation and the other guests comment and you stop talking, what do you think they would do? That’s exactly what they’ll do online too! How do you think your guests would feel if you stopped answering them at a party? How do you think the person on the other end of the telephone would feel if you suddenly stopped talking? That’s how your Facebook, Twitter, blog, online community and fan page commenters feel! ANSWER THEM!

Remember that just because you don’t see people face to face when you are online, doesn’t’ mean they don’t feel the same way they would if you were. If you post and they come and comment, it’s rude not to respond. They make it easy on Facebook so do it! Click “like.” It only takes a second! Respond with a . It only takes two. Answer their questions, respond to their comments. The more you do, the more they will engage. The more you ignore people, the less they will even read what you post!

I am amazed at all the people who post a ton of stuff on their wall or blog, invite comments and then NEVER go back and acknowledge the people who took the time to respond—especially the ones who took a great deal of time to write a thoughtful and helpful post.

I hear some of you thinking, “I just don’t have time to respond.” Then don’t post so much. Don’t ask from others what you are unwilling or unable to reciprocate.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
If you liked this post, read…Seven Reasons Why YOU Should Sign Up for the Art of Eloquence Newsletter!

Share this:

Filed Under: Communication Articles Tagged With: blog, comments, Field of Dreams, internet marketing, Kevin Costner, replies

Do we really need the letter C?

April 20, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

Of all the letters of the alphabet, I have always thought the letter “c” a bit superfluous. After all, the letter “k” can take over for words with the hard “k” sounds as in: kite, kind, kindred and kitten so why not use it for “kalorie, korner, kandy and kopy?” The letter “s” can pinch hit for words with “s” sounds as in: sound, sign, silly and senses so why not use it for “sylinder” and “sytoplasm?”

If we laid off the letter “c,” kindergarten kids would only have 25 letters of the alphabet to “kopy.” Weight watchers would “kount kalories” and kids would eat “kandy korn” unless they didn’t eat their “serial” in the morning.

Oh, I know what you’re thinking! What would we do about children? I think the sound that ch makes “kould” be replaced quite nicely by the letters “tsh” because that’s really the sound it makes after all, isn’t it? Mothers would “kontinue” to warn their “tshildren” to bring along their sweaters just in “kase” they got “tshilly.”

So what do you say? “Kan” we say we are agreed or are you a bit ”synical?”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
If you liked this post, read…Seven Reasons Why YOU Should Sign Up for the Art of Eloquence Newsletter!

Share this:

Filed Under: Friday Funnies Tagged With: alphabet, c, letter

What’s a comfort zone?

April 18, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

What’s a comfort zone? I think I forgot again. I’ll have to go look that up. Let’s see…Comfort zone, noun, “the level at which one functions with ease and familiarity.” Hmmm…

I grew up all over the U.S.- always the new kid on the block. When I was 2 weeks old, I moved from Colorado to Florida. We lived in too many places to count there and, in just two years, we moved again after my sister was born. Settling down in N.Y. for eight whole years, we lived in an apartment and two different houses. I went to two of every school except for college. Every time my father’s company needed a volunteer to move across country, my father’s hand went up and a packing we did go. To this day I have no idea how to get around anywhere. I’m always mixing up streets and directions. I get lost backing out of my own driveway.

Growing up in an Atheist home, most of my friends were of some religious belief or other. I was the only one of my friends who wasn’t from a religious family and I knew nothing about my Jewish heritage nor any other religion. While everyone talked about their shared religious experiences, I felt not only like an outsider, but an ignorant one at that. Even around family, some of whom were practicing Jews, I felt like an outsider.

My mom and dad were pretty conservative; their family wasn’t. There were many family squabbles about politics–most of which were respectful, but at the very least, somewhat uncomfortable.

I’m not even a regular sized person. Finding clothes to fit me was always difficult. I still shop in the children’s section for shoes. I can’t see the mirrors in the ladies rooms and my feet don’t touch the floor when I sit on most couches unless I sit at the edge. Until my senior year in high school, I was 4′ 11 3/4″. I reached my astounding height of 5′ nuthin’ SHORTLY before I started college. LOL It was quite an uncomfortable ride to college each morning as I shlumped into the bucket seat of my 1974 Datson 710 (affectionately named Iggy). I sat atop my telephone book so that I could see over the steering wheel. My brother would occasionally borrow my car and rip the pages out of my telephone book. One day I noticed that I was peering at the road through the steering wheel. When I looked down at my telephone book, I realized why. I was down to the Ms!

Many years ago, I became a Christian. It was one of the most uncomfortable discussions I have ever had with my family. We still have many difficult discussions about faith as my family consists primarily of Atheists and Agnostics of Jewish heritage but also practicing Jews, Catholics and a Jehovah’s Witness. Family gatherings are certainly interesting and diverse.

Having had health issues for over 30 years that conventional doctors were unwilling to treat, I turned to holistic and naturopathic doctors and remedies. Some in my family think I’m nutz! I never did have my son immunized and we don’t usually take him to the doctor unless his incredible immune system doesn’t handle something well, which is incredibly rare. We don’t usually do antibiotics or flu shots so those discussions are lively as well.

Being in sales and then owning my own business is another area of my life that is unusual. Having to explain why I’m home but WORKING has been difficult for some to grasp.

As a homeschooler of almost 12 years, I have had many an uncomfortable discussion with friends and family members who felt my education choice for my children would surely leave them unfit for society. I think I can safely hold my head up now that my daughter is graduating with honors and Phi Beta Kappa from one of the most elite universities in the nation.

Always the odd man out, always the weird one, I learned very early the need to explain myself and my beliefs. Being uncomfortable in most situations has actually benefited me in many ways. I guess that’s just one of the perks of living outside a comfort zone. What about you?

What’s your comfort zone? If it keeps you from resolving conflicts, relating to others, talking about your business, speaking in public, sharing your faith or political views, overcoming shyness or being seen as a leader, I can help!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
If you liked this post, read…Seven Reasons Why YOU Should Sign Up for the Art of Eloquence Newsletter!

Share this:

Filed Under: Word Wednesday Tagged With: Christian, comfort zone, homeschool, vaccines

It’s a Blog Contest!

April 16, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

We haven’t done one of these in a long time, but they are such fun! Introducing the…

Art of Eloquence SIMPLE Blog Contest!

I’ve been hearing a great deal of grumbling about some of the latest trends in contests–contests so incredibly complex that people don’t have any idea what they are supposed to do. I’ve heard about contests so time intensive that the prize just isn’t worth it: Counting points, making videos. writing essays… Well, welcome to the Art of Eloquence SIMPLE Blog Contest! Here’s the deal:

Contest:
We’re running this contest to create awareness for our newly redesigned newsletter and we’ve added two new gifts just for subscribing! Click this link to read Seven Reasons to Sign Up for the Art of Eloquence Newsletter.

Prize:
The winner will be chosen at random from among all the entries and will win THEIR CHOICE of ANY Art of Eloquence study!

Rules:
1. Subscribe to our newsletter (make sure you confirm as it’s double opt in!)

2. Come back to this post and leave us a a very short comment about our newseltter or any of the free gifts.

That’s it!

If you’re already subscribed…
Then just post a very short comment here telling us what you like about the newsletter or any of the free gifts we’ve given away. (We may use your comment in our marketing.)

Winner:
The winner will be chosen at random from among the comment entries left on THIS blog post.

Deadline:
Deadline to enter is Sunday, April 22, 2012 at midnight PST.

* Please share this blog post and help us get the word out about the contest. The more the merrier. In fact, if we get enough entries, we may be persuaded to choose more than one winner!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
If you liked this post, read…Seven Reasons Why YOU Should Sign Up for the Art of Eloquence Newsletter!

Share this:

Filed Under: Contests Tagged With: blog contest, contest, Newsletter, prize, Subscribe Here!, subscriber, winners

10 Things People Would Rather Do Than Speak in Public

April 13, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

10 Things People Would Rather Do Than Speak in Public…

1.Count the blades of grass

2. Eat Liver

3. Sit in rush hour traffic

4. Listen to nails scratching on a blackboard

5. Babysit Tommy the Terrible

6. Pay their taxes

7. Have root canal

8. Jump out of an airplane

9. Snuggle with a grizzly bear

10. Eat worms

What about you?

1 Thing You Can do to Overcome the Fear: Click here!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
For detailed articles/tips on various communication topics, free gifts and exclusive offers, subscribe to our newsletter! Subscribe now and get two free gifts including JoJo’s free eBook, Communication Activities: Finding Time to Talk to Your Children is a Busy World.

Share this:

Filed Under: Friday Funnies Tagged With: Public speaking

Redundant Redundancies

April 11, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

I posted this several years ago, but I felt it was worth repeating lol…and I have some new additions.

It all started a while back when I found an Abraham Lincoln quote:

“People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like.”

It sounded so close to something my dad always says:

“This is the kind of thing you like if you like that kind of thing.”

I posted them on Facebook and began getting responses that were such great fun like this one:

“Where ever you go, there you are!” -I have no idea who originally said this, do you?

Which reminded me of a funny message my sister and her family had on their answering machine for years:

“None of us are here ‘cuz all of us are somewhere else. When some of us return, one of us will call you back.”

And the circular thinking of things like this one from my good friend BeckyJoie:

“The Department of Redundancy Department”

Then later on that day I was surfing the net trolling for blog fodder when I came upon this little gem:

“It is bad luck to be superstitious.”-Andrew W. Mathis

And check out my new Visual JoJoism on the top left. Care to join me in my “Quote Madness”? Post your own favorite Redundant Redundancy here!

Share this:

Filed Under: Word Wednesday Tagged With: Redundancies

Freshen Up Your Communication with Positive and Supportive Language

April 9, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

Have you ever been in a hurry or just plain frustrated to where you were rather curt or downright rude to someone? We tend to do this more with those we’re closest to rather than with strangers. We use harsh words, we nitpick, we exaggerate, and we wound. Sometimes we do it with our children and often we do it with our spouses. Some of us do it so much it has become a habit and to the point where we don’t even realize we are tearing down the very ones God has entrusted us to lift up. But God tells us in Proverbs 15:1 “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.”

We are called, Instead, to support, be helpful, positive and uplifting.

The Lord tells us to control our tongue:
Proverbs 10:19 “In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.”
Proverbs 11:12 “He that is void of wisdom despiseth his neighbour: but a man of understanding holdeth his peace.”
Proverbs 11:13 “A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter.”
Proverbs 21:23 “Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles.”

x
Because otherwise we may either communicate that we don’t care or wound others:
Proverbs 16:28 “A froward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends.”
Proverbs 18:8 “The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.”
Proverbs 25:18 “A man that beareth false witness against his neighbour is a maul, and a sword, and a sharp arrow.”
Proverbs 18:21 “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.”
Proverbs 20:19 “He that goeth about as a talebearer revealeth secrets: therefore meddle not with him that flattereth with his lip.”

Knowing that we are to control our tongue and uplift others is one thing, but doing it is quite another. It’s hard to be nice when we are frustrated. It’s not easy to be uplifting when we feel pressed for time. Here are three simple tips that will help you to be more grace filled in your communication with others—especially those in our immediate family.

Three Tips to Soften Our Hearts and Words:
1. Ask yourself if what you are about to say is necessary and if it honors God.
Is what you are about to say something that really needs to be said? Is it really all that important that you correct Mary’s English or do you think everyone understood her well enough? Unless the crowd would be convinced of evil or it would do them some amount of damage, isn’t it better to leave Mary’s words alone rather than nitpick her English and make her feel inferior?

Is what you are about to day honoring to God or are you just convinced that you are the self appointed Conversation Correction Patrol? If what you are about to say will honor God by righting a wrong, correcting an injustice or helping someone, then go ahead. However, if what you are going to say will not reflect a loving God, then your mother was right, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

2. Put yourself in their shoes.
If God is calling you to say something, think first how you might feel if you were in their shoes. How would you want it to be said? Sharing a difficult bit of information is better said and easier heard if you do it in grace and with respect. Put yourself in their shoes and then word your communication accordingly.

3. Smile.
It’s hard to be harsh when you’re smiling. If what you’re about to say is of a more serious nature, smile on the inside as you say it. Smiling helps soften your heart and choose your words more respectfully.

Taking the time to think through what you are doing to say actually saves time in the long run. You’ll speak carefully so you won’t have to go back and correct yourself and you’ll speak graciously so you won’t have to go back and apologize for yourself either. Taking the time to freshen up our communication to be more uplifting actually causes less stress in our lives as well. So take the time to be uplifting and supportive to others and to speak words of love and care instead of the hurried harsh words we tend to give those closest to us.

Obviously, there is a lot more to it than just these three tips would lead you to believe. If you’d like some more information on how to speak in grace I suggest downloading sample lessons from two of our communication studies: 21 Days to More Godly Communication and Say What You Mean: Avoiding, Reducing and Resolving Conflicts. And for detailed articles/tips on various communication topics…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
For detailed articles/tips on various communication topics, free gifts and exclusive offers, subscribe to our newsletter! Subscribe now and get two free gifts including JoJo’s free eBook, Communication Activities: Finding Time to Talk to Your Children is a Busy World.

Share this:

Filed Under: Communication Articles Tagged With: communication, freshen up, language, positive, supportive

This is NOT a Door!

April 6, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

A door by any other name…may not open? So, if it’s NOT a door, what is it exactly? Post your guess.

see more epicfails

Share this:

Filed Under: Friday Funnies Tagged With: door, guess

Redefining Words

April 4, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

Over the years, the meanings of words do change and for many different reasons. I thought it would be fun to take a look back at some of these words. Enjoy!

Some words have changed meanings for technological reasons.
1. A tweet used to be the sound a bird makes. Now it’s a 140 character message you type on a social networking site where people share things from political news to what they had for dinner.

2. The word friend is now a verb. Where I used to have a friend over for dinner, I now “friend” someone on Facebook and tell them what I had for dinner.

3. Text used to be a noun meaning the original words and form of a written or printed work. Now it’s a verb meaning to send a message via cell phone.

Some words have changed as common usage has changed.
1. The word ultimate means the last in a list of items. However, it’s been widely used to indicate the best as in “the ultimate driving machine,” the slogan used by BMW. This word is so widely misused that if you “google” (a word invented for the Information Age) it, you will find most of the entries refer to the word as meaning the best.

2. The words fewer and less have been used interchangeably. Less is supposed to be used when comparing quantities that can’t be counted. You’d like less trouble. Fewer is to be used for comparing items you can count. Nobody wants fewer dollars! However, we are encouraged to tweet in 140 characters or less.

Some words have been accepted after being incorrectly overused.
1. The word literally has literally lost all meaning. Defined as something that is actually taking place, literally has been used in place of the word “really” so often, that it has become accepted or literally ignored in the sentence. I’ve been so frustrated by this misuse that I am literally hopping mad.

2. Totally is another word that has been similarly redefined and overused. You could totally take out all the totally meaningless words totally from this sentence and totally be left with a totally meaningless sentence. Totally!

And finally some words have changed meaning totally because of technological opportunities to incorrectly use and overuse accepted slang.
All people have a heart. Some people have heart, but these days, people ♥ all kinds of things. In fact, if you don’t know how to create a heart symbol with your keyboard, you can simply say “I heart you” and most everyone will understand and think you clever.

What other words have been redefined? You should totally share the ones you ♥!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
For detailed articles/tips on various communication topics, free gifts and exclusive offers, subscribe to our newsletter! Subscribe now and get JoJo’s free eBook, Communication Activities: Finding Time to Talk to Your Children is a Busy World.

Share this:

Filed Under: Word Wednesday Tagged With: meaning, technology, words

New FB Practice: Weird, Impersonal or Professional?

April 2, 2012 By Art of Eloquence

I just had to put this to you and ask what you all think about this new Facebook practice. More and more people are setting up Facebook fan pages. Companies have one, authors, entertainers…Bubble Wrap! Everybody has a fan page. However, the practice of trying to keep your fans “engaged” has taken its toll on the page owners time.

I usually post three or four times a day on my fan page, but some people post ten or twenty times a day on their fan pages. I could see how that might become combersome. So what’s a page owner to do? Outsource! Many Facebook fan page owners are now hiring a Virtual Assistant to take care of these daily tasks for them.

Sometimes it’s not readily apparent. The VA posts as if she is the page owner and says what that page owner might say the way she might say it. But other times it’s fairly obvious that the person posting isn’t the page owner. At what point is this considered weird or impersonal? In an effort to be professional, some page owners have hired people that make it fairly obvious the page owner doesn’t spend any time on her own fan page.

Do you feel cheated if the page owner isn’t the one posting? After all, you “liked” her fan page to find out more about her and what she has to offer. Or do you feel like it’s much more professional to have a third party posting? After all, you don’t expect a busy celebrity to have the time to post on Facebook 20 times a day.

What gives it away that it’s not really the page owner posting? Does it bother you? Would you rather she did all the posting even if it were less often? Or do you think it’s perfectly acceptable or more professional to find someone specifically hired to do all the Facebook fan page postings? What say you?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
For detailed articles/tips on various communication topics, free gifts and exclusive offers, subscribe to our newsletter! Subcribe now and get JoJo’s free eBook, Communication Activities: Finding Time to Talk to Your Children is a Busy World.

Share this:

Filed Under: Business Communication Tagged With: Bubble Wrap, Facebook fan pages, outsourcing, Virtual Assistant

If you build it and they come, then what?

Do we really need the letter C?

What’s a comfort zone?

10 Things People Would Rather Do Than Speak in Public

Redundant Redundancies

Freshen Up Your Communication with Positive and Supportive Language

This is NOT a Door!

Redefining Words

New FB Practice: Weird, Impersonal or Professional?

Subscribe to JoJo’s Blog

Sign up for our Newsletter

Join us on Facebook

AoE Monthly Seminars